Traffic Court is Ruining my Day!

At 6am my alarm went off. The noise was so abrasive I thought the world was coming to an end. Then I remembered I set the alarm, I had court date at 8. Court dates are kinda like regular dates; you plan you week around them, you pick out an appropriate outfit, you get ready early. Except when you are headed to court you aren't happy, or excited about who you might meet; in fact its the people you'll meet that make a court date such a dreaded experience.

I've been to court all over the country, well not really-- just Urbana, Chicago, and Las Vegas, but I'm no rookie. I know what the whole court experience entails. With that being said, today, was horrible!

I decided to take the metro because I know parking in LA is a major pain (blog on LA parking coming soon). If you live in LA, you may have never taken the metro. Its not like the 'El' in the Chi, or the subway in New York. It has limited service, and there isn't really a coherent paying system. No one checks your pass, there's no gate you have to pass through, in fact, I suspect most people ride for free. It's quite, and there are people in winter coats who smell like Venice beach sleeping inside the cars. I just put my headphones on and zoned out to Sergio Mendes. I thought about that Floetry video "Yes", it took place on a subway train; I wish my ride had been more like that.

I finally got off the train at Grand, and walked four blocks to the court house. Immediately I saw a line of people wrapped around the side of the building. "Oh boy, this is going to be a long day" I muttered. I was right. A police officer came outside and told everyone to take off their belts. I followed suit and before I knew it I was inside the massive building headed to the fourth floor for my "date".

By this time it was 7:50 so I rushed onto the elevator. When the doors opened I was greeted by another line. This one was not moving. I sat down in line, on the floor and waited. Finally at 8:30 an officer walked down the line collecting i.d.'s and court papers that he would take inside to be matched up with case files. Then like cattle we were led into and seated on the left side of the courtroom. The cops then proceeded to call our names one by one re-directing us to sit on the right side of the courtroom.

Eventually after what seemed like an endless first-day-of-school role call, a little man with white hair stood in the front of the room and read some sort of proclamation. He explained that the judge was a temporary judge and informed us we would have to sign a waiver giving our consent to have our cases heard before this "second rate" judge. Then he played a recording which explained the difference between a not-guilty, guilty and no contest plea (in English and Spanish).

After what I'm sure was an eternity (around 9:50am) the "judge" called my name. "Not guilty!" I said before he even read my charges. He mumbled something about a thirty-five dollar bail, and directed me to the cashier. Big surprise, another line! This line was unbelievably slow, when I finally got to the front the lady who helped my was unexpectantly pleasant. She explained I would have to pay $159, or I could request an O.R. from the court. I choose the later, which means I have to go back to court within the next seven days an endure this process again. I didn't get home until 11:17am. I left my house at 7:10am and I didn't get back until 11:17am!

The surprisingly pleasant lady told me there is no good time to come to traffic court. "It is always like this" she said with sympathy in her eyes. So here's my personal solution. I came up with it on my way home. Don't get tickets! Tell your friends and family to avoid tickets at all costs. Run, spit, kick, cry, whatever you do, just don't get a traffic ticket in LA!

This has to be the dumbest system in the country. A total waste of resources, time, and money. It is no wonder California is in the midst of a budget crisis. If the inefficiency I witnessed in court today is any indication of how things are done in Sacramento... oh brother!